Hilariously Not Lolita: Courtesy of eBay

I've been visiting home for the past few weeks, so my updates became a bit less frequent recently, and I also somewhat dropped the ball on my summer wardrobe. Unfortunately, especially when it comes to spending money, I am a slacker. My wardrobe has a little under 10 real pieces at the moment, and Summer only has a little over a month left. Needless to say, my "Summer" wardrobe won't be getting much use this year. Lucky for me, I live in a climate where Fall and Summer aren't too different from each other, so I should be able to get away with recycling most of my Summer wardrobe into the next season, which is exactly what I intend on doing. With that said, I'll push on building my Summer wardrobe while keeping fall compatibility in mind. However, let this be a lesson to those of you planning your capsule wardrobes! Give yourself plenty of time and don't let yourself waver too much on your purchases, or you'll end up with only half completed wardrobes like me. 
Feeling the pressure of time, I've been spending a lot of my time browsing eBay for relevant auctions and good deals. As much as I want a full Liz Lisa closet, I'm still new to the fashion so I'll have to make do with cheaper off brand items for the bulk of my pieces. Thankfully, I'm finding that there are a lot of eBay sellers which focus on cheap Asian fashion, and a lot of these are very relevant to himekaji as well! One tip I've learned for shopping for several j-fashions on the cheap is to simply search for "lolita" on eBay and then sort by price. While you won't have much luck shopping for a lolita coord on eBay, you will find that it is ripe with j-fashion appropriate items of all flavors! Of course, this is also a great form of entertainment. In the context of lolita, the items range from "tacky" to "ugly" to "what the heck were you thinking!?". In the spirit of sharing my amusement with you (and because my sewing machine is packed up at the moment, I can't really afford to buy much until I get paid, and I thus have pretty much no other topics to write on) I present to you:

The Top 20 Non-Lolita Things Listed as Lolita on eBay

1. What is loliable?

By far the worst offender is the loliable: clothing which is not lolita brand but could easily fit into a lolita coord... or so they think. Of course there are lots of things which totally fit this category. However, the following do not.

The cutting edge of office lady lolita.

I still remember the bloodbath over AP's booty shorts release.

This isn't ok even without calling it lolita.

I dare you to coord this.

2. Etsy-tier.

Because it's a dress with a themed print it must be lolita, right?

It's just a matter of adding a petti.

Simply adorkable.

Cheap lace a lolita skirt makes not.

3. Wrong lolita, asshole.

Lots of people think that lolita is some weird fetish. Some people take that assumption a step further.

I hate how everyone always forgets about all the fishnet used in elegant Victorian fashion.

Is this what male fantasy lolita looks like?

It's guro lolita, guys.

4. Seriously, what were you thinking?

Some of this stuff doesn't fit cleanly into any category, because I really have no idea what they were thinking when they decided to list this stuff as lolita.

Make the pom pom violence stop.

Nothing says lolita like the stars and stripes of freedom.

Please tell me this isn't some kind of weird ageplay thing.

5. Remember when Lolita Kisama made everyone think visual kei was lolita?

I hope I'm not the only one who remembers the brand that totally defined my middle school fashion experience. The brand might be dead, but its spirit lives on in listings like these.

Everyone will know you listen to Linkin Park.

Going for that "gothic prom queen zombie" look.

Nothing screams elegance like cheap raschel lace.

6. Lace monsters and cosplay and satin, oh my!

I'll wrap up this post with the cheap halloween costumes of lolita fashion.

Complete the look with rocking horse shoes and a Chobits headband.

Complete the look with cat ears, a leash and collar, and low self esteem.

Complete the look by throwing it in the trash.

It's not a costume, god mom.

Thank  you for coming with me on this wild ride.

Until next time,